The start.

Well, it's Sunday night.

I'm sitting at my sister's house, laying on her couch. She is making dinner with her husband, and her sons are running in and out of the room, laughing and playing. I have almost been at her house for a month...

My son is laying next to me.

My son.

His name is Grif.

He is really amazing.

I can't wait to tell you about him.

It's hard to figure out where our story begins. It intertwines so much with our other story. Which would make sense, because this is our family. Let me try to rewind...

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You know how we got to adoption. We wrote all about on our adoption blog. One night, I woke up in the middle of the night. I had a dream so vivid, it was hard to distinguish if it actually had really happened or not. I had a smile across my face, and a content feeling of peace.

I knew I needed to remember it.

I woke up Chris and told him, "We are going to have two brown baby boys."

Then, went right back to sleep.

The months went by. We finally finished all our paper work, appointments, interviews, etc. You can specify what you are looking for in an adoption situation. We wanted the Lord to direct the children that are meant for our family; not us. So, the only specifications we listed were for the child to be healthy---that alone was a hard choice to make. We had faith that everything else would be orchestrated just perfectly, and left the "picking and choosing" up to the Lord. Maybe we would get a daughter? Maybe we would get a curly haired red head? Maybe the baby would be brand new, or maybe it would be a year old?

We were approved on January 31st.

We had our crib set up, and ready to go. Each morning we would ask each other each day, if today would be the day that we would find our baby. As the days wore on, the novelty started to wear off, and my heart started breaking. I knew with a true certainty, that there were still children missing from our family. We needed to find them.

And I was terrified I would miss them.

Some days it felt overwhelming. I felt like I was paddling frantically, and yet my head was just barely keeping above water.