Here's the deal.

I haven't known what to say, really.

I guess it's been a while. Did you notice? So much has happened. And really, I didn't miss you at all, silly ol' blog. I didn't really have any plans on returning, either. There was a comment here, and a comment there that kept me going, but in the end, the motivation simply did not exist.

And then this happened.

And then that.

And then another thing.

And so on.

And it seemed like there was no way to come back, unless I covered all the grounds. And I didn't have it in me to do that. Ya know?

When I think of 2009, it makes me shudder. And catch my breath. Then sigh. Yes, yes, it brought wonderful, bountiful gifts, but to be honest, when the clock struck midnight, closing out the year, I sighed a large sigh of relief: good ridince.

Sigh. Again.

I made it out alive.

GOODBYE 2009.

And then life kept happening. And you know, tragedy found me in 2010.

And I haven't really known how to tell my story since. But to simply ignore this kind of reflection is even more wrenching.

So much to tell. So much is my story. So much is your story. And it's kind of confusing like that. I'm not one to do play-by-plays; because it's your story to tell. But then again, your life affected my life. But it formed it. It hurt me. Moved me. Shook me. Scared me. Refined me.

And so this is for you. To say thank you. Thank you for being a part of my life. And letting me be a part of yours.

Because I love you, and you have made my life.