Well, sometimes when you are jerk, you get sick

I don't know about you, but my two year old is an angel.

When we went to the pool today, I was eyeing J very carefully. He just had this sly look about him. You know what I mean?? Like he was up to no good. I watched him slowly check out the pool from a few different points of view.

Then, I saw it all happen, like a well devised plan. I had been very excited to see another two year swimming at the pool just moments earlier. I mean, this other kid was really swimming!! You know those crazy swim lessons, where you drown your kid into submission??? Ya, apparently he just completed the course.

J thinks he can swim. He has no idea that after he does a cannon ball into the pool, I'm actually saving his life by pulling him to the surface of the water---again, and again. Apparently he got quite offended when I tried to suggest that the other little boy was an amazing swimmer, and, "Wow!! don't you wish you could swim that!!" as the little boy gracefully, calmly swam under water, holding his breath for like 15 seconds or something, after his Dad chucked him half way across the pool.

It was awesome!

So, about a half hour later, I saw J lock in on him.

He watched him like a hawk.

And then ever-so-casually walks up.

AND SHOVES HIM INTO THE POOL.

THEN SHRUGS.

AND WALKS OFF LIKE NO BIG DEAL.

Oh my gosh.

Oh my gosh.

OH MY GOSH.

I was dying.

It took every ounce of my soul to not stand up and walk right out of there after questioning all the pool patrons, "WHO'S CHILD IS THIS!?"

Seriously.

And the "Your Kid is Lame" award goes to.... DUN DUN DUN!!

Oh, driving home from the pool, I reached back to hold hands with J, and he was burning up hot. Burning up. So, since J's immune system goes from like a 10-1 in half a second, I'm sure tomorrow he will have pneumonia or something. Naturally, I concluded God obviously saw what transpired at the pool, and was not pleased.

And cursed him.

Yep.

That, or... he has asthma, and it actually has been a month or so since he's been sick, so it's due time. Think what you want; either way, I'm totally holding him to the, "You are sick because you pushed your friend into the pool" theory. Object lessons, people!!

I think he will understand the direct correlation.