Two

I have two little ones.

I guess I didn't realize HOW different it would really be. I didn't even realize how much I was expecting them to be the same, until little Hugh was born. When they handed him to me immediately after he was born, I was actually taken back because I instantly realized, "Wow, this is a totally different baby."

I guess when you are expecting your second (or I guess I should way when I was expecting my second--I shouldn't assume everyone is the same), I thought, "Ok, been there, done that. I know what to expect." But, and this is the oh-so-obvious, you don't know what to expect!! This baby is a brand new baby, and a totally differnet human than your first.

It's mind blowing.

To me.

I love both of my children, as if they are simply extensions of my very own soul. I would do anything for either one of them. Anything. J was one of my very best friends before Hugh was born. I didn't know how I would ever love another as much as him. I was convinced it was impossible, and almost mourned for this second potential child, because I just knew he was going to get the bum end of the deal---after all, J was my first love.

However, when Hugh was born, it was like my heart doubled. I was born, again... again. I became two mothers, all in one. My soul was multiplied. Again. It's an incredible feeling to explain. It's not that my heart was sharing room with Hugh and J, but that it physically just doubled over. Impossible? I thought so, too.

I now feel like a mother of two. Because I have two different humans, they need two different Moms---all wrapped up in the package called "Me". It's amazing how mothers pull this off!I look forward to being the mother of these two boys (I still can't believe I have two boys...). I hope I can always be the mother both of these boys need. I love them dearly, and I'm so grateful they both have come to me. I am honored. I adore them both, and thank them daily for making me their Mom.

For I could want nothing more.